Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Dear Thatha...


My paternal grandfather
When I heard the news on the 2nd January that you have been taken to the hospital due to chest pain, I wasn't majorly worried. Deep in my heart I knew that you would somehow make it back home like you always have in the past. Little did I know you were tired of fighting...
On the last day(19th of January) when I saw you at the hospital, you couldn't speak, you had absolutely no energy... yet you were smiling, you solved complex math problems and watched cricket. A funny incident comes to my mind as I think back to that day at the hospital..I remember there was a door mat outside the bathroom which wasn't kept properly. You called me, kept pointing that way and I could not for the life of me understand what you were trying to convey. Ammai came to my rescue and said "He wants us to put it in its proper place". And you know,that did not surprise me. You were always a very very systematic and organized person. You kept cleaning up after folks at home, you arranged and rearranged book shelves, you ate your meals at the correct times, you rarely ate out, you never missed your evening walks at the beach.. Gosh I could go on and on. You probably inherited this from your mother(Paati).. you were such a good son to her.
The evergreen couple
You were also a very caring husband... The day of your funeral, the 21st of January also happened to be your wedding anniversary. I am most worried about Ammai. You were so protective of her, you literally held her hand through all these years and she looks so lost without you. I'm afraid she will never be the same person in your absence. But I am glad that she has sons and daughters in law to look after her. They all looked up to you so much and are all hurting inside because you were a very loving father. Proud of all 4 of them too. I'm glad they have inherited good qualities from you.

Brothers! 

Daughters in law! 

As for me, I knew you best as a fun loving grandfather. I couldn't have asked for someone better. I've lived with you as a baby, I've lived with you as a school going kid and I lived with you again while I worked 2 years ago. Things were the same.. You would knock on the door, wake me up, scold me(very gently!) about waking up late, ask me to bathe and pray and get on with my day... I loved all the pampering even as a 25 year old ;-) You had unbelievable patience Thatha.. Nobody could have taught me math/accounts problems as patiently as you did! You were so active till the end.. You wanted to learn how to email, you wanted a Facebook account, you kept wanting to learn and that is so amazing!! Kudos to you.
Happy Days


 I'm happy for you in a lot of ways...thanks to your children, you could visit other countries.. I shall cherish all the lovely memories of our US trip, you had a grand 80th birthday, you took an active part at my wedding(I will always remember how you fished out a suit at the last minute to wear at my reception since it was part of our dress code, such a sport you were!), you witnessed Vishal's poonal function so proudly and most importantly did not suffer too much in your last days. It felt very strange being in your room last night. I could sense your presence all around.. your cell phone, your glasses, everything reminded me of you.. I know you're always going to be around in spirit to guide us. I know you were tired of fighting to live and that's perfectly ok. I'm happy you're in a much happier place. Sleep well dearest Thatha. Love you very much and thanks for all that you've done for us.
Aishu
PS Leaving you with a few family pictures :) 



My going away party, August 2006

He loved family get togethers as is evident from his big smile - 2007 

With a very goofy Thatha at the Niagara :) - May 2008

At the temple in our hometown in Palakkad, Kerala. A trip which I missed out on - Aug 2010
A big gang at Vishal's Poonal function - June 2011


4 comments:

Anonymous said...

That was so touching Aishu - I wont call you secretary here - for here you are a wonderful caring grand daughter!

Personally I have great respect and affection for Kailas Athimbar. Along with Athai he was an epitome for hospitality.

Our family was greatly honoured and touched when he drove down from Neyveli with Athai to attend our sister Usha's wedding in Chennai.

He had a naughty sense of humour. As late as the thiruppagazh session last month at Shekhar's house, my chair collapsed and I fell down. His immediate remark was " Kailasukku Saami Piduchhirukko ? " Unbeatable.

Will always remember him for his kindness,gentleness and humility.

Snaky said...

Lovely.. Beautifully written and I could so feel your mixed emotions.. Take care Aishu.. Kailas athimber was best known for his meticulous nature and witty comments.. May he rest in peace..

Aishu said...

Thanks for your nice words, Kailash Periappa and Sneha! :)

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