An ode to our HERO!

My maternal grandpa 

We have a hero, we call him Thatha! I mean just look at that picture - so handsome, poised, rugged, dashing, suave, dapper.. Gosh I could go on and on! Point is he was such a good looking man! 
But more importantly, a very nice person. There are people in this world who make it a better place, by merely being in it. One such person was my maternal grandfather. This blog is just an ode, a small tribute to him for being the wonderful human being that he was! And excuse the number of photos : I did that on purpose, because you see my grandfather loved pictures and never missed a photo op :-) Enjoy viewing! 

My dear Thatha, 
It is exactly a week since you left us but honestly we feel your presence every time we are at Nest. Especially when I stand in the balcony amidst all the greenery - your most favorite place at home! 

And when I used to ask why you like to sit outside so much, you would say you wanted your daily dose of Vitamin D! Aah. Yes. You were such a health freak - right from taking daily walks for an hour, to eating healthy(soups n salads being your absolute favorites!), making sure you had your daily intake of green veggies, vitamins etc and so it angers me that somebody like you, who was so systematic, had to battle cancer. But what amazed me was your spirit and your strength to keep going on with life - you were such a fighter until the very end. I still remember speaking to you on the first day of your radiation treatment.. you said you were all dressed up to head to the clinic and you were very certain that you would over come the cancer. Now if that is not resilience, then what is, right? 

You were such a positive person - all of us have come to you with problems galore and you would just laugh it off. You always believed in us and kept us going. 

Because to you family meant everything. You loved it all : the get togethers, the food, the compulsory group photo sessions(much to others' annoyance!), the sibling bonding etc. 

New Years eve gang

Moorthy Mama's party, 2012

Of course, none of these would have been possible without Thathi's unending support. You were an amazing couple. She used to cook for tons of people although you guys would have a World War around whom to invite, what to make etc. But right until the very end, you were there for each other and were perfect! Glad you two are reunited in heaven now :) 

Wedding photo

Taken at my wedding, May 2011

Thathi's 75th birthday, June 2013

Family photo Take 1: Nov 2012

I must say that you got lucky because you have 4 daughters who absolutely doted on you both and got even luckier because you had 4 sons in law who took the best care of you right until the very end! Not everybody gets this lucky. And I'm sure they all did it because of the values you've instilled in them and the fact that you and Thathi set an example for them to follow. 

4 darlings! 

Mala

Anu

Bhuns and Maxie

Awesome foursome

SILS

For us grandkids though, our days with you and Thathi at Achala Vihar were easily the BEST! We always looked forward to visits there - you would patiently cut fruits for us(most of which Sneha used to hog!), and Thathi would make yummy food which we'd just gorge on. You'd spoil us silly by giving out money and then secretly call me to go buy potato chips from that Kerala Chips place in Annanagar! Haha, fun times those were! 
If I'm able to drive a car in any country today, its all because of you and I'll forever be grateful to you! You'd pick me up at 6 am every single day without fail in your white Maruti Omni and take me for a spin. And of course in return I would have to help you with bank work(draw cash, update passbook etc.). I also had to help you with sending emails to Moorthy Chitappa and RR Mama in the US- it was a pretty tough job, given the Shakespeare that you were, I had to ensure my emails were error free!

Vivek/Archna

Aishu 

Ashwin/Mittu

Snuggy

Ronnie

Sanju

Twins! 

 It was not just the immediate family that you cared about. You took a genuine interest in the well being of the extended family too, especially your siblings. You were a wonderful brother in every sense! You would call them almost everyday to inquire about their well being and to generally stay in touch. I will agree that all of us used to make so much fun of you for perennially talking on the phone; however today as I look back, I realize how much it meant to each one of them. All the emails, phone calls from across the world, the touching condolence messages.. they all proved what a popular and loved man you were! 

Bala mama

With Thanga Paati

Thiruvanmiyur Beach, Dec 2014

The youngest sibling :)

Birthday celebs

The siblings at Calicut

It was not just the siblings, you adored your nephews/nieces too :)

87th birthday party at Nest

Your interests were varied - right from reading up on World Wars to vegetable cutting, to Carnatic music and of course your love for playing the Mridangam! To perform an Arangetram at the "young" age of 75 was no mean feat and it was such a proud moment for all of us!! 

Best friends

His most fave. Umayalpuram and Anuradha Sriram

I would fail if I don't mention your generosity and helping tendencies especially when it came to the needy - the poor watchman, maids, the iron fellow, the ladies who clean the building.. they all literally adored you simply because you tipped them randomly, gave so generously during festivals and never failed to smile or greet them on your daily walks. No surprise then that so many of them came to pay their last respects to you. 

I always dreaded the day that would bring the news of your death; strangely though, on the 1st Nov 2016 when I heard, I felt peaceful and happy. Happy that you passed away peacefully without any struggle.  

My dear Thatha, you will live on in our hearts and minds and you will continue to be a HUGE part of my life, wherever I am, because a part of you resides deep inside my heart. You’ve left us with your footprints to follow and your legacy to live up to. Rest in peace, Thatha! We love you! 

PS : I will admit to have stolen some photos from different sources, you know who you are - thank you for the memories :-) 

Family Photo Take 2: July 2015

Sachinnnn.. Sachin!

I could cry... My hero, the person whom I adore, my most beloved Sachin is playing is his last ever innings and I am stuck at work in Chennai.. with a pile of work to do! Life is so not fair!!
Sachin, you have provided us with some fantastic memories over the last 20 plus years..you would think we are satisfied now.. but no.. we STILL want you to hit that century and leave in true Sachin style.. Thank you for all the fun you have provided, cricket will never be the same again. #ThankYouSachin 

Busy bee

I've missed this space so much. But life has been keeping me way too busy this past month and a half. To start with, in the end of July I interviewed with a company for an HR position and to my absolute delight, I got the job. It is a start up so the company culture is still evolving. But I've finished more than a month now. I'm slowly settling in. Work is very exciting no doubt but very very demanding as well. Since most employees come only in the night shift, I tend to get pulled into lots of last minute meetings. But as a rule, I leave work by 7 pm. Which means I get home by 7:45 pm. Which means I need to semi cook dinner in the morning. Which means lots of planning. Which means grocery and vegetable shopping over the weekends. Which means no breathing space. Sigh. This is the busiest I've been in a long long time. Its too early to tell but so far all well. The people at work are nice. Lots of youngsters. And oh I have a boy to assist me with recruitment and interviews. Very cool stuff! :) Wish me luck and send some good wishes my way.

Before I started work, the end of July, K's friends and the families took a small road trip to Yelagiri, a nearby hill station which has absolutely nothing to do :) It's that sort of place where you just drive and drive and just chill. K of course took some lovely pictures and freaked out! It was good fun to watch each other getting drunk, chatting, eating junk and just catching up on each other's lives. Good times!

August was chugging along nicely until she threw me a nasty surprise. I lost my dear grandmother,Thathi. It was a rude shock and one that I've barely come to terms with. It all happened all too suddenly. That's another reason why I've not been able to blog. Weekends have been busy with rituals and planning for the upcoming week.

Sneha and Deepak celebrated their 1st wedding anniversary on the 27th! They were holidaying in Goa and a few of us decided to surprise them. So we sent them flowers with a small note. There were overjoyed. Little pleasures of life :) I wish them many more years of togetherness, laughter and everlasting love! Congratulations both of you :)

Ok I wish I could keep writing. It keeps me so relaxed. But I gtg now! Need to get my beauty sleep. Off I go. Until my next post.. Stay well dearies.

To the bestest paal paysam maker ever! RIP Thathi =(

My dearest Thathi,

I've opened this page a 100 times and I'm unable to write anything sensible. Too many emotions running through me. All I want to say is that you've left behind such a big void, its going to be very very difficult for someone to fill in your shoes. I'm so relieved you had such a peaceful end.. no hospital visits, no doctors.. nothing. A person like you deserved an end like that. You made so many people happy.. you were so generous with money, you fed a zillion hungry people(including me!) and you were so full of life. No wonder then so many people mourned along with the rest of us. It was very painful to watch Thatha crying the day you left us. He was, like the rest of us, in a state of extreme shock. He doubts he will ever be able to cope with your loss. And I agree. Because you spent all your life looking after him and feeding him all his favorite delicacies. Apart from running the house, taking care of your 4 precious daughters, and of course being a loving grandmother to all of us brats! We have the bestest of memories at Achala Vihar!! Growing up with you & Thatha was so amazing. You gave us so much freedom. I remember we hated leaving you guys and going home with our respective parents. I am happy that we recently celebrated your 76th birthday with a grand dinner with all your favorite people around. Just how you like it!

I'll remember that smiling face of yours forever. But visits to the Nest won't ever be the same again. We miss you tons. That's an understatement. Wherever you are, I hope you are in safe hands. And yes I more than hope you keep that smile alive :-) Thanks Thathi. For your unending help and support through the years. Rest in peace. Love, Aishu

PS I really tried writing more. Too many clouded thoughts. Sorry. 

June - Part II(The not so good stuff)

Continued from here... 

Post the in laws' anniversary, I geared up for Shan's wedding which was on the 23rd. Now, I missed most of my good friends' weddings since I was away in the US. So I was damn excited when Shan was getting married coz it meant some fun times with my college friends. Needless to say, I went a little crazy. I love weddings. And everything that comes with it. It started with her bachelorette first. We surprised her at home, we picked "red" as the theme, got ourselves eye masks, she popped some champagne and off we went to Illusions to celebrate. Was good fun but we didn't do anything "crazy". Then her sister was throwing a surprise "bridal shower". Yes. Don't ask me what the difference is. But it was good fun too. Basically, she had completely decorated a room in their house, we took along pics of us with Shan, we cut cake, we played some games, and made the bride laugh a lot. The groom also came in the end, which was a cute surprise indeed. Then there was her Mehendi 1 day before the wedding. Again, lots of girls gathered at her house. Clicked tons and tons of pics. By this time my hubby was completely annoyed. He felt I was going for too many functions and not spending time at home and specifically with him because all these happened over weekends. Now when he is pissed, he sulks. He sulks some more. And keeps on sulking. He won't speak. He won't tell me why he is pissed. I'm expected to read his mind. Honestly, I didn't have the time to read the signs. Like I said I was too busy socializing. Next day morning was the wedding and then in the evening was the reception. Nope. We are not done yet. The finale was the cocktail party at Blend. For which I went too. And that pretty much did it. K was super pissed. Like "I didn't think he was going to spare me alive" kinda pissed. He accused me of ignoring him, ignoring my chores around the house and said I didn't know to "balance" it out.  Maybe this is a good time to explain why we kinda clash so much. Let me tell you briefly about our personalities. I'm very outgoing, I love people and I cannot survive without socializing with people. I grab any opportunity I get to go out and socialize(not necessarily a party person, I love to just catch up with friends even if its just coffee!). My darling husband is the complete opposite. He likes everything to be low-key, has a few but good trusted friends and will avoid people as much as possible. Nothing wrong with that.  I'm someone that needs lots of space. Like LOTS and LOTS of it. I'm not clingy. In fact, I panic and get very uncomfortable if someone gets too clingy with me. Don't ask me why. I'm just like that! My hubs, on the other hand,  isn't usually clingy but eventually gets there thanks to me.  I guess its the effect I have on him. I am not very expressive or overly romantic. Ok I'll admit. I'm the least romantic person I think :-( He reaches a stage where he seeks reassurance and if I'm not around then, god forbid what can happen! He unleashes his wrath. One thing I wish to learn from him is to control my tongue during a fight. Its next to impossible for me. I say stuff, I bellow like an idiot. He usually keeps shut. That's his way of rebelling. But this time, even he lashed out. We both lashed out at each other. It just turned very very ugly. Urgh. The more I think about it, the more annoyed I get. I still don't know who was wrong, whether it could have been avoided etc. But then we did end up fighting a lot. It took away all the fun I had during all the weddings. I wished things were different and we didn't end up saying all those things(at least I wish). But then I cannot turn back time. Every day was like that. He would crib about everything - food, things around the house, me in general! It was so so so annoying. I wished he wouldn't seek perfection in every single aspect. If there's one thing I want to change in him, its that! I'm nowhere close to it. #lesigh.

To be continued...

*Disturbia*

There have been a few "incidents" in the last one month that has left me wondering where our country is really headed. They are simple things but left such an impact on me nevertheless.
Scene 1 - At Chennai airport
It is 11:30 pm. K and I had just returned from our trip to Delhi(was great fun,btw!). I was standing in line to get my cab and K was standing away in a corner. There was this dude(hereby referred to as "moron")  all dressed up formally in a business suit. He goes near K and SPITS right next to him. Now those of you who my husband can guess what follows :) He blew his top! And rightly so. Here's how the conversation went
K - (furiously) - Excuse me, what do you think you are doing?? Aren't you ashamed?
Moron - (Nonchalantly) - Well everybody else is doing it! Why are you asking only me?
K - (Raising his voice) - Well you seem educated! Don't you have any sense not to spit in public? Plus you are spitting right near me! And I of course have a problem with that!

Well basically moron didn't want to admit it but honestly it was so embarrassing for him because by now everybody was staring at him. Yes my husband can be VERY loud! I panicked because I had no idea what had happened. But when K explained I wished he could have actually slapped that idiot. Honestly man, get a grip on yourself, wherever you are!

Scene 2 - Sathyam Cinemas
K and I watched Vishwaroopam this weekend. The theatre is full(Saturday evening). Most of the families had come with KIDS. Mind you, it is an Adults movie, lots of violence and gore. I don't understand how parents can actually think of bringing those tiny tots to such a movie and how theatres don't even object.
But anyway, there were kids in front of us and at the back row as well. The kid in front wouldn't sit quiet for a minute. He was probably around 3 or 4, obviously he wants to explore. The mother tried her best to get him to sit quietly but no such luck. Finally, she grabbed him and took him outside. Good girl. Now there are about 4 kids sitting at the back. And they kept pushing my seat. I was trying to be patient. But they just wouldn't listen. I'm turning and giving looks at the mother(she is too engrossed with the movie to notice my glares). Good thing is I had watched the film earlier. It was K who was watching it for the first time. And then it reached a point where the kids started screaming. High pitched squeals! K lost it. He got up and turned to the mother and said "Excuse me, can you please keep your kids under control"? The lady just called to her kids and simply said "please come sit here quietly". YEAH RIGHT. They are kids for God's sake, woman! They went on screaming and K got up again and this time in a very menacing tone said " Listen, if you don't get those kids to shut up, I'm going to get the management to throw you guys out"! That probably did it. Coz you will not believe, that lady finally got her act together and ensured her kids shut up for the rest of film. Not one word came out! Phew. My point is I'm not blaming the kids. But if you can't control them, take them outside the movie hall or get them to behave. As simple as that. And please definitely don't take them for such noisy and violent movies. Even my 10 year cousin wasn't allowed to watch it at home. Not appropriate for him. Simple no?

Scene 3 - LB Road(A very busy road in Chennai)
K and I are returning home. At the junction, there is a cop vehicle coming in exactly the wrong direction. Due to which traffic is held up for a few seconds. Cars simply give way. My hubby was the only one who stopped the gypsy and showed his finger to the cop. Ok not finger but he made it obvious to the cop(s) sitting in the Innova that it was simply unacceptable and shocking that a cop(who is supposed to tell others to follow rules) is happily breaking one and holding up traffic because he was too lazy  to make a U turn. Shocking no? The cops were a little shocked but of course in true Chennai police style, glared back threateningly. I was a little scared because I had heard stories of how they take away your car keys and slap you. But then I was proud of my  hubby for standing up to those goons. I wish I could have taken a picture of that van and posted it on the Chennai City Traffic Police page and made a mockery of them. But like I said, it was a busy road and I had no such luck. Sigh. Pissed me off so so so much.
God save this country. Ok I'm done ranting. On that note, February was super super busy. My bestie, M got married. Yay! Congrats! Another friend, Shan, got engaged. Yahoo! And then K and I took off to Delhi for his cousin's wedding which was also great fun. Bread pakodas, masala chai, samosa, kachori all at 6 degree weather. Blissful combination, no? :-)

Dear Thatha...

My paternal grandfather

When I heard the news on the 2nd January that you have been taken to the hospital due to chest pain, I wasn't majorly worried. Deep in my heart I knew that you would somehow make it back home like you always have in the past. Little did I know you were tired of fighting...
On the last day(19th of January) when I saw you at the hospital, you couldn't speak, you had absolutely no energy... yet you were smiling, you solved complex math problems and watched cricket. A funny incident comes to my mind as I think back to that day at the hospital..I remember there was a door mat outside the bathroom which wasn't kept properly. You called me, kept pointing that way and I could not for the life of me understand what you were trying to convey. Ammai came to my rescue and said "He wants us to put it in its proper place". And you know,that did not surprise me. You were always a very very systematic and organized person. You kept cleaning up after folks at home, you arranged and rearranged book shelves, you ate your meals at the correct times, you rarely ate out, you never missed your evening walks at the beach.. Gosh I could go on and on. You probably inherited this from your mother(Paati).. you were such a good son to her.

The evergreen couple

You were also a very caring husband... The day of your funeral, the 21st of January also happened to be your wedding anniversary. I am most worried about Ammai. You were so protective of her, you literally held her hand through all these years and she looks so lost without you. I'm afraid she will never be the same person in your absence. But I am glad that she has sons and daughters in law to look after her. They all looked up to you so much and are all hurting inside because you were a very loving father. Proud of all 4 of them too. I'm glad they have inherited good qualities from you.

Brothers! 

Daughters in law! 

As for me, I knew you best as a fun loving grandfather. I couldn't have asked for someone better. I've lived with you as a baby, I've lived with you as a school going kid and I lived with you again while I worked 2 years ago. Things were the same.. You would knock on the door, wake me up, scold me(very gently!) about waking up late, ask me to bathe and pray and get on with my day... I loved all the pampering even as a 25 year old ;-) You had unbelievable patience Thatha.. Nobody could have taught me math/accounts problems as patiently as you did! You were so active till the end.. You wanted to learn how to email, you wanted a Facebook account, you kept wanting to learn and that is so amazing!! Kudos to you.

Happy Days

 I'm happy for you in a lot of ways...thanks to your children, you could visit other countries.. I shall cherish all the lovely memories of our US trip, you had a grand 80th birthday, you took an active part at my wedding(I will always remember how you fished out a suit at the last minute to wear at my reception since it was part of our dress code, such a sport you were!), you witnessed Vishal's poonal function so proudly and most importantly did not suffer too much in your last days. It felt very strange being in your room last night. I could sense your presence all around.. your cell phone, your glasses, everything reminded me of you.. I know you're always going to be around in spirit to guide us. I know you were tired of fighting to live and that's perfectly ok. I'm happy you're in a much happier place. Sleep well dearest Thatha. Love you very much and thanks for all that you've done for us.
Aishu
PS Leaving you with a few family pictures :) 

My going away party, August 2006

He loved family get togethers as is evident from his big smile - 2007 

With a very goofy Thatha at the Niagara :) - May 2008

At the temple in our hometown in Palakkad, Kerala. A trip which I missed out on - Aug 2010

A big gang at Vishal's Poonal function - June 2011

A bad start

I'm sorry. I should have waited and posted something bright and cheery as my first post for 2013. However that pretty much sums up how these couple of weeks have been. Stressful. First, Thatha fell sick. Like "we didn't know if he was going to make it" kinda sick. In fact, K was the only soul who kept telling me to keep the faith. And believe it or not, he was right. There was a turnaround. Touchwood. Praying for his recovery. 

Next, I hear Keith fell sick. You know how close I am to the Haseltines and I was shocked to hear he had a heart attack. Not good. He is stable and doing better but its been a wake up call in terms of the lifestyle changes they have to make etc. Depressing. My bestie has been going through some real crap. I wish things would improve for her. So is my MIL. I pray for her to bounce back to life, just like how I have seen her in 2010. She is going through a lot. I don't know how much more she can handle. I wish I can help.. not sure how though. I hear K's good friend's father is also very very sick, he visited him yesterday. Dunno if he will survive. K's best friend is also sick. He had a surgery last week, thankfully is recovering well and is back home now. So as you can see, I've heard of so many people being sick. Too many hospital visits between K and me. Enough. Its been super stressful just hearing so many people going through health issues. Can good health prevail for all please? 

Feelin' low

It's just one of those days.. ok actually week.. where I've been feeling low. Low about so many things - its been busy nevertheless. Work's been super busy, so busy that I hardly had the time to spend at home and do things around the house. I've never been a clean freak, but even I was quite disgusted at how dirty the house had gotten over the last ten days. The weekend was a bitch, I had to work on Saturday and spent the entire Sunday at the event, hoping I'd get a comp off Monday. Surprise Surprise - I had to show up on Monday also. Wth! :(
Which meant, I hardly had time to catch up - no surprise that the hubby is super pissed, we had a huge argument around it, we've been fighting a lot. Phew.
What's worse is we are off to Delhi this Thursday and I was soooo looking forward to it - to do all that sight seeing/shopping/eating chaat/buying shoes... oh all that general blah.. Suddenly it doesn't excite me anymore.
S-A-D --- hoping things get better. Could do with some hugs now. Hope to be back in a better frame of mind, sorry guys.

Grumpiness - Part II

I am home alone on a Saturday night, bored as hell. My better half is out partying his @$$ off!!!! Was supposed to be hanging out with my bestie and she fell sick. Sucks. I hate sitting in this house all by myself. No nice movies on TV tonight. Jeez, life couldn't get any better could it? 

Grumpiness

He wasn't around this morning when I woke up, he wasn't around when I was getting ready for work, he wasn't around on my way to work ... the house is quiet, lonely and eerie. Waaaahhhhhh..... K is on his first official trip this weekend and me not liking it. One bit. I am sad, grumpy and irritable. Can u please hurry up and come back to me, please?